my father asked me to make a biodata, I felt like everything I had to put on there would be a lame attempt for me to try and market myself and make myself palatable
it’s kind of funny though, he is a really awkward guy and I can tell he finally forced himself to bring up the marriage stuff because he doesn’t think I should be alone
"And do not resolve on the tie of marriage until the waiting period reaches its end. And know that Allah knows what is in your hearts, so beware of Him..."
Implication: Allah acknowledges what's in the heart — emotions are natural — but commands us to act responsibly and not form marital-like bonds prematurely.
It is not just physical zina that is forbidden, God tells us to protect our hearts
maybe because giving your heart time and time again will harden it, make you cynical, detached and desensitized
as I realize more and more about the kind of relationship I would want in the future (bc I’m a girl sitting at home) I think that haram breeds grounds for lust, infatuation, limerence, conditions, betrayal, abandonment
but what does it mean to know and understand someone, or to know if they would be a compatible partner to you?
I know love doesn’t just happen once
I know that you can come to love people as you spend time with them, build memories and comfort with them
we are human at the end of the day
and that is a large part of why we have to set certain boundaries with people
you can love and be blinded by people, allow yourself to be swayed by ideas and promises
you will likely find yourself doing the same when its something you can’t actualize, no one is perfect
but Islam is grounding and real, it is not safe to have that vulnerability or hopefulness with someone that hasn’t faced God and decided to make that commitment to you
I have watched most people jump from person to person, in pursuit of the next thing that could work, maybe looking for a distraction and never truly healing, rationalizing each person as a lesson and experience